Hang the DJ

Did you endure your teen years during the mid to late 80's? If so, there's a fair chance you spent some time listening to The Smiths. Actually, let's be more precise about that. There's a good chance you spent some of those teen years moping about while listening to Morrisey's emoting.

Spend a second looking around to see if somebody is watching you read this. You're looking back on that time now with some embarrassment, hoping nobody sees you right now. All clear? Good.

Probably about the time you hit college, you gave this up. The ease of finding alcohol and sex makes whinging less appealing. Also, you start to get sheepish about that shit. Did you ever listen to some of those lyrics?!? "And if a double-decker bus/Kills the both of us/To die by your side/Is such a heavenly way to die." Nobody ever accused Morrisey of having a light touch.

Giving up this music was a wise move at the time. Did you meet anyone who still listened to The Smiths in college? What a happy group. My favorite was a truly gifted poseur from Alabama of all places who wore lots of black and would sing their songs in a very poor Manchester accent, especially (no lie) those with any reference to "The Queen" or Margaret Thatcher. An Anglophile, 'Bama-born, shit-kicker imitating the accent and falsetto of a hammy British lounge singer weeping as "Margaret on the Guillotine" plays -- I don't even know how to make that a sentence, and if you try too hard to conjure up that mental image your brain may shut down.

So, you probably haven't listened to them in years and while you may think about them once in a while -- catch a snippet of a song here, get reminded of a riff there -- you haven't pulled out those CD's or bought replacements. Well, now is the time.

See, while Morrisey took himself very seriously, contemplating the significance (and woe) of his own navel, Johnny Marr wrote some of the catchiest tunes you'll ever find. I defy you to listen to This Charming Man and not be snared by those hooks. Feel free to roll your eyes when Morrisey (isn't it a warning when somebody christens themselves with one name?) cries "But still I'd leap in front of a flying bullet for you", but don't miss the music. I just picked up Singles and couldn't be happier about it.

Health Insurance scares me, the candidates make me feel better.

The Plain Dealer today had a section outlining each candidates plan. After reading it, I couldn't help but think it sounded like 3 pot heads sitting around talking about how they would 'change everything'. If that's true, I just wonder if they are sharing